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Three Stages of Self-Transformation



Three Stages of Self-Transformation

Photo by Bilel Naili from Pexels

In working with over ten-thousand people of various cultures, I have learnt over my twenty-seven years of service, that true self-transformation requires us to travel through three stages.

Before I share these stages, I would like to name five core assumptions about authentic self-transformation:

1. The battlefield of change is in the mind. This is where true self-transformation occurs. We change when our mind’s response to circumstances changes. Attempting personal change by changing external circumstances is a shaky approach. Ultimately, it is your mind that must change.

2. Personal change involves discomfort and growing pains related to stepping out of our comfort-zone. By comfort zone I mean habitual beliefs, thoughts, habits, and knee-jerk reactions that we have become accustomed to and are limiting us.

3. In the process of self-transformation, we are not inventing a “new you”; we are simply dusting off illusions that are covering your authentic essence before any baggage burdened your spontaneity. In other words, we are coming full circle back to your unscathed, original self.

4. I believe that it is not past events that hurt you as much as your interpretations of such events. Very often, our perceptions of past evens are much more impactful than the events themselves.

5. In a quantum world of action/reaction, meaning cause-and- effect, it is not that life happens to us. Most of us have stubborn and unwanted self-fulfilling prophecies that force the hand of nature. We wind up manifesting what we insist is the Truth, not realizing that we are living in our own hall of mirrors, manifesting a reality that reflects and proves our own pet theories of life.

Now, take a look at these three stages of self-transformation, and see if they make sense to you:

I. Identify the Liar

I have never worked with a person who did not have a Liar/impostor living in their mind. This Liar gives us bad advice and the Liar’s voice is the voice of fear and defensiveness. The human ego gathers “baggage” from the past by coming up with negative interpretations of what happened. The hurt or guarded self (ego) then lives in us as an impostor or “false self”; its voice and thoughts feel just like our own, yet every time we follow the Liar’s defensive advice, our life takes a step backwards.

One of the biggest lies that cripples millions is Toxic Shame. Toxic shame is the feeling of I am not good enough; there is something wrong with me; I will never measure up; something about me is flawed; I am not deserving of happiness, or love is not meant for me.

Anyone who has truly healed from self-limiting notions, addictions, defensiveness, toxic shame, negativity, or knee-jerk reactions, has had to dis-identify, and separate their sane self from the Liar living in a corner of their mind. Unless we separate and dis-identify with the Impostor/Liar, it will sabotage and bamboozle our true self who is seeking wholeness.

II. Reprogram your Subconscious

The subconscious mind that controls more than 80% of your life through hidden beliefs, habits, and knee-jerk reactions, does not speak English, Japanese, or Arabic—it has its own language. If you don’t speak its language, it will not let you in. Your subconscious is not your enemy; your subconscious is trying to safeguard your hurt-self by not allowing anyone in, not even your present self who is seeking contentment.

Your subconscious, core-beliefs were formed like a software program by the time you were seven years old. All your deepest beliefs about sexuality, money, your worth, intelligence, attractiveness, etc. are parts of that old programming (conditioning). That old programming, if negative or self-limiting, now forms the walls of a prison cell that experts call The Comfort Zone. Your subconscious bamboozles you into believing that walking out of your comfort zone is very dangerous. This is one reason why so few experience massive self-transformation during a lifetime.

With over twenty-seven years of experimentation with myself and some ten-thousand students, I now realize that the otherwise inaccessible subconscious opens up through fourteen approaches that generally embrace emotions, imagery, and surrender to Higher Powers.

Your subconscious understands repetition, repetition, repetition. Through repetition of these fourteen techniques, you will rewire, and cleanse any negativity lodged in your subconscious.

At the end of phase II, you will come to realize that I am and have always been deserving of the best that life offers.

III. Take Big Steps for Big Results

Once your subconscious buys into self-love, deservingness, true worth, and self-potential, it will generate and unleash massive amounts of energy to fill the gap between your current situation and the beautiful life that you are seeking.

The challenge is to get your subconscious to buy into the true possibility that a Greater You exists even now. Once your subconscious believes this, it will turn over heaven and hell to manifest your vision.


Kambiz Naficy is a Persian poet and an international meditation teacher of Kriya Yoga breathing meditation ( After success on Wall Street as an international banker, Kambiz spent fifteen years in India learning from the Grand Masters of Yoga and meditation. Kambiz began his own work, guiding others, some twenty-seven years ago and now teaches in twelve different countries with over 10,000 students. He started a spiritual organization in his home country of Iran for sixteen years and was imprisoned for teaching meditation. He now lives with his family in Washington D.C while writing and teaching workshops in self-transformation and Kriya Yoga meditation. He has taught at well-known centers such as The Omega Institute, the New York Open Center, and Yogaville in Virginia. Kambiz has also led meditation and self-transformation seminars for IBM, Mercedes Benz, and international agencies of The United Nations.